Anenomes are one of the hardest things to keep. Some people are lucky with them right off the hop. The long tentacle one would have been hardier then this one. If it was still not doing well, then there is an issue somewhere. We do not know a lot about your tank. You have a 20 with 10 sump with an AI Prime light. Your tank is about 10 months old and classified as a nano. They are a lot harder to care for then a larger tank. Adding too much top up will change salinity shocking them, or if the salinity and temp arent the same in the new water change water, that can shock them as well. So many variable in a smaller tank. They are also more difficult to keep stability over a long period. I am not sure why he is shrinking, they sometimes just do that, and other times it is not a good sign. Hopefully he turns around and fattens up okay.
Would a 5% every other day or daily water change help with the sensitivity to my water params? ... i do also havd a 4inch sand bed ive had mixed responses on it saying its trapping crap and gases and thst i should syphon some out.
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Everything in this hobby is mixed responses. What works in one persons tank doesnt in the next person. Some people swear by a DSB, others swear by a bare bottom tank and there are people all over in between. Same goes for siphoning. I have never once siphoned my 120 or any other salt water tank I have owned over the last 6 years, but other do it weekly. You will have to find what works, take things slow. If this anenome does not make it, then I suggest you wait a few more months before trying again.